More than standard

Working behind the scenes with Abbey Clancy in Ibiza

I've been thinking a lot about my old corporate job over the last two weeks. About the leader, the woman I used to be.

I always knew that it completely consumed me. That I gave it everything I had. That I lived it 24/7, that I shaped and moulded myself to fit.

Looking back now, I can see the other side of the coin.

It also gave me a sense of creative freedom and the opportunity to work with the best leaders in the marketing, communications, beauty, music and fashion world. I can still feel the adrenalin in my body when I think about some of the projects, people and places I visited. I experienced so much.

That chapter wired me. It taught me what I was capable of. It showed me what high-stakes creativity, global collaboration, and relentless delivery could look like. And it also showed me, in very clear terms, what that level of consumption costs.

This week, I decided to go on a memory hop and pulled out a variety of photos and I was blown away. I realised that the part of me that I hadn't acknowledged was the brilliantly creative me, the me that could walk into rooms and build relationships with complete strangers – from Dita Von Teese, Kelly Osbourne to Juliette Lewis to Oasis.

Liam Gallagher once said to me, "You could get where water doesn't." And it was true.

Remembering my old career has helped me come back into full alignment

Working with celebrities, VIPs, the beauty elite, CEOs and media to such a high level over 17-years really shaped me. I can also see how the coach inside me was also being shaped and how this is still useful today.

I've been admiring the young girl who had ambition and vision, even from a young age, because I didn't come from connections and privilege. I came from working-class stock and I had big dreams.

I came from a small town. I knew nothing of the worlds I was about to experience, yet that small girl loved reading fashion magazines and was captivated by the beauty and personalities of the supermodels.

Now I see my talent, focus and passion. I also had a lot of fun and made a big difference shaping programmes still in existence today that have raised over $25.5 million USD for breast cancer charities globally over 23 years.

In so many ways I was living the dream: travelling to LA and New York for meetings and events, from the Oscars to New York Fashion Week, as well as appearing on TV in Ibiza with iconic hairdresser James Brown and Abbey Clancy.

As I rose through the corporate ranks, I had an eye for images. I knew what would make a powerful picture that sold a message and a story. Again, I never really owned this talent and saw it as standard.

In a world that will tell you you can be replaced at any time, it's time to start saying "no" to that. It's time to start believing in you, your vision, your dreams and your capacity.

I have so much that I want to acknowledge today, not from a place of ego but from a place of saying: you did all of that. You travelled the world, you danced to the beat of your own drum, you mingled with the fashion, music and beauty elite, you worked with the best people and you had so much fun.

You became part of the backstage scene and you deserved to be there – it wasn't all luck, you had a capacity to cut through and create wonder.

Of course, there is always the other side of this story: the insecurities, the fear programming, a nervous system that was out of whack and a life that was spinning too fast.

My message for today's rising stars is this: don't forget to take time to acknowledge your brilliance, to look in the mirror and say, "Wow, you are really amazing." To see and to own your talents and to not apologise for them, diminish them or see them as standard. You are not standard, you are you.

Now, as I work with women leaders, I see my younger self in so many of the stories I hear. The drive. The adaptability. The willingness to shape and shrink and stretch to fit the role. The belief that if you just give enough, do enough, be enough, you'll finally be safe, valued, secure.

I also see what becomes possible when we start to question that deal.

When we stop asking, "How do I fit?" and start asking, "What do I actually want my leadership to feel like at this stage of my life?"

For me, looking back isn't about regret, but about re-claiming a part of me that has been lost along the way.

This work is about honouring the leaders we were and allowing the leaders we are becoming to walk together.

More to come on what I'm learning, and how this has been shaping the way I work with women now.

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